DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband loves meeting other women. He flirts and chats with them but never gives me a second look.
We’ve been married for 10 years. He’s 45 and I’m 41. He’s not affectionate towards me these days. I get a peck on the cheek when he goes to work but that’s all.
We don’t have sex any more but he says it’s because he “has problems”. When we used to have sex, it would be over very quickly for him and I’d get frustrated.
Now if we get invited out anywhere and there are single women around, he gets them a drink and engages with them as if he wants to get their number. I’m fed up.
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DEIDRE SAYS: If sex is over quickly for him it’s denting his pride. He’s checking in with other women to build his self-esteem to prove that he’s still attractive.
This is hurtful to you though and you deserve better.
In a quiet moment, explain to him that you want the attention on you and not on other women.
Ask him what you can do to improve your relationship from his point of view and listen carefully to what he has to say.
Tell him how you see your relationship improving, and that you miss the intimacy.
My support pack about helping your partner to last longer, explains how to slow everything down when it comes to sex.
