DEAR DEIDRE: MY sex life is failing because I can only get fully aroused when I’m wearing women’s clothes.
I’m a man of 42 and my wife doesn’t know that I have this fetish.
It started when I was a kid because I had two big sisters and we used to play dressing-up games. I found when I hit puberty, that the soft materials against my skin gave me a thrill.
I hide my clothes in a storage unit but get them out when my wife is away visiting her mother for the weekend.
As soon as I’ve had my sexual relief, I put them away and dress like a man again.
I buy and sell my feminine attire on auction sites. Lots of men buy my stuff. I know it’s common.
My wife is 39 and she’s told me she misses intimacy with me but I can’t perform without dressing in women’s clothes.
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DEIDRE SAYS: First of all, I want to let you know that many men experience the same need to wear women’s clothing in order to become aroused.
Your wife is missing intimacy and you don’t feel comfortable letting her know about your fetish.
You need to work out if you can share your secret with your wife and how to explain that this need isn’t necessarily a threat to your relationship.
You would find it hugely reassuring to talk to a sex and relationship counsellor. Perhaps you could start on your own and then invite your wife.
COSRT (COSRT.org.uk) can help put you in contact with a reputable therapist.
